Wednesday, November 10, 2004

Ashcroft - New Latino Version Now Available!

Hispanics Create Ashcroft Clone!
Apparently, there is no run on potential assholes to fill vacancies in the Bush administration.

If you're Bushy, what do you do when one of your biggest pricks steps down from their post? Why, you go to the hometeam in Texas, where they apparently have idiots in spades! (Ok, not everything from Texas sucks - We have a few friends from there and of course, greatest band ever Spoon hails from Texas's culture capital of Austin - but there are a disproportionate number of jackasses hailing from the Lonestar state).

So, let's take a look at Senor Gonzales's record (via MyWay News):

-Repudiate Supreme Court's opinion on detaining suspects without access to lawyers or courts? - CHECK!
-Support Bushy on the right to waive anti-torture law and international treaties providing protections to prisoners of war (Abu Ghraib ring a bell?) - CHECK!
-Raise the concern of fellow conservatives who question whether this former partner in a Houston law firm which represented the scandal-ridden energy giant Enron will continue squashing the civil rights of Americans? - CHECK!

Good job! You passed the Bush administration litmus test, Alberto!

Some of you may be thinking, blah blah fucking blah. Who cares? What, is The Semi-Regular now a fucking political blog? Is this some half-assed Wonkette?

Ok...we'll try to focus more on the Tara Reid and Paris Hilton news that you all apparently love so much.